Gone Away

i.

desertification-1

brother hasn’t been right since
the war so daddy has him out
in the fields with the hands
they treat him right and take
his hand when he starts
wanderin’ off and sometimes
bring him back to the house
when he takes to cryin’ and
everyone gets worried that
he might go off like he did last
May, tryin’ to hurt hisself and
even raised his hand to daddy
but he never goes after me
he just strokes my head and
calls me goodpup
i know daddy’s mad ’cause he
says they ain’t no woman ever
gonna marry him up what with
him havin’ a boy who’s gonesoft
and me no bigger than a
rabbit turd
sometimes daddy looks at him
and it scares me what he’s thinkin’
not that there’s much i can
do on account of me being just
a pup or a rabbit turd
dependin’ on who you ask

ii.

3885622226_b7c8d73459 (1)

hell, i know i ain’t right
i know he has me workin’
with the hands mebbe
’cause he’s scairt of me
i dunno
funny how a furrow just
turns into a trench and
‘fore i know it, i’m back there
with the blood and the screamin’
the screamin’ and the cryin’
the cryin’ and the prayin’
i remember this pup, this good pup
he took my bullet
shoulda been me that died
in all that mud
god, he was a good pup
and yeah, i see how he looks at me
can’t tell if he hates me or
just wants me gone
next time i wander off to ypres
wonder if he’ll just let me go
dunno when that’s gonna
happen though, but i’ll tell you this
i’m takin’ the pup with me
heard it said that
war is hell and it’s true
but what they don’t tell you
is that sometimes you bring
it home with you

iii.                                                             smallsoldhouse1903

good lord, how i loved
that woman-the boys’ ma
beautiful and sweet she was
sweet as spring
we buried her while he was
off killing the kaiser
died of a busted ‘pendix
don’t know if the little ‘un
even remembers her
he looks like her though
hurts so damn bad to look
at him, so god help me,
i don’t
the big ‘un looks like me,
folks say, and now
look at him
got hisself busted up over
there and looks at me like
i’m some damn kraut
pretty sure he thinks about
running me through with
that bayonet he thinks
he still carries
cursed and damned is
what i am
woman dead and one son
i can’t even look at ‘n
the other one all messed up
p’raps next time he walks
i’ll just let ’em go
start over
find a new gal and
start plantin’ again

©ceg 2009

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6 thoughts on “Gone Away

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